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Perfection on the tube
Posted at 11:18 AM
It doesn't exist. OK, it does, but mostly in the fall. By Paul Honda Of course, perfection doesn't exist. Just turn on your TV on a Sunday morning. There's no NFL football, which is, by the way, the finest creation of marketing in history. What was the NFL before TV? It was a mostly floundering pack of "has-beens" who held regular jobs (butchers, insurance salesmen, cops ... OK, being a police officer is no way an ordinary job, but you get the gist). They played football for a little pocket change. A glamorized semi-pro league, basically, without even health insurance. (That takes me back to my coverage of the Hawaii Football League and the Big Island's Kona Ikaika, Hilo Bulls and Waimea (forgot their nickname) when they'd play other "club" teams. Good, hard-hitting football.) No, turn on your TV on a Sunday morning and you won't find NFL pre-game and post-game shows, no 3-hour games flooded with flyers to watch Cold Case, or 60 Minutes. What you get are horrendous matchups from the NBA. I love the NBA, absolutely, going back to the days when Brent Musburger was the play-by-play guy (circa 1970s). But the scheduling sucks. Who cares about the Miami Heat and their makule lineup? The Heat don't really become the Heat, yes, the defending champs, until the playoffs anyway. Shaq gets away with suiting up for fewer and fewer games every year. He's already said out loud that his "plan" of sorts is to be healthy when Round 1 of the post-season begins. The Heat are an assemblage of aging stars who are too slow to run the floor with the league's thoroughbreds, who specialize in slowdown, halfcourt basketball. In other words, pass the rock around until D-Wade goes 1-on-2 and hits another insane, slightly off-balance 20-footer from the wing. I dig the players for playing smart ball, but the Heat are on national TV every week. What the heck is that? Give me the Suns. The Suns I can watch twice a day, if that were allowed. They play fluid, racehorse basketball. The ball moves, players all get touches, they all cut to the basket or spot up to rain 3s on the rest of the copycat league. They turn steals into points, your mistakes into their happiness. It's basketball in the NBA as it once was, sorta, and the way it has evolved into. Oh, I agree that Kobe and LeBron are among the league's gems. Any Laker fan like myself can appreciate seeing their ascent as a team. But the Cavaliers? Watching the entire Cav offense bog down into another 1-on-2 move by LeBron gets old after a few possessions. This is a team that often scores in the 70s and 80s. It's actually boring most of the time. But the NBA continues to put LeBron and the Cavs on TV a lot more than I care to see. My formula for great NBA broadcasts goes something like this A. Any Suns game is worthy of telecast. OK, there are a few teams that aren't mediocre, teams that are even entertaining. I like watching the Wizards. Anybody like Gilbert Arenas, who can casually loft a 30-footer and hit all net consistently has my respect. The Nuggets are interesting in terms of tempo and potential, sort of like watching a kindergartner explore finger painting for the first time, and the kid happens to be Picasso's grandson. The Spurs are hearty, yet boring unless you appreciate tenacious defense (Bruce Bowen). The Mavs ... I liked them better when they ran the floor. Of course, they're fun in a way because they win, they play team ball, they have skills on the perimeter out of a few 6-foot-6 guys (matchup nightmares), and Avery Johnson reminds me of one of my best pals in the world. Even with a pioneering owner (Mark Cuban), the team itself isn't "sexy" to me. I do respect them, though. (And they do have the coolest retro jerseys in the league.) Ahh, perfection. It isn't on the boob tube. Never really was, aside from UH football laying a can of whoopass on BYU back in the day. Well, I can't deny that PBS is incredible, too, but that's for another column. Previous Article: Pupule's Top 10 ballot, Feb. 11 Comments © Copyright 2003 HondaReport.com/Leahi.Net
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