I'd been dreading this day, hoping to get it over with, but it was actually OK and somewhat pain-free.

Saw a lot of my Mom's old deaf friends. Most of her brothers and sisters made it. Most of my cousins made it, too, to my surprise. Some friends from work, even one who came for just a few minutes before he had to sprint back to the office. Wes was there, which was cool.

Unfortunately, my sister kind of ruined it by having her "pal" (local TV news celebrity) speak on her behalf. My brother needed a ride home later (his wife took the little ones home earlier because they were way past bedtime and real cranky) so we talked about this.

My sister won't talk in front of people about Mom because she knows we'd all see through the facade. She even had the friggin gall to mention her f**king Melaluca crap in the middle of that b.s. speech (that her celebrity pal read) as part of her "treatment" of Mom in the last few years. (One of her Melaluca/Amway "friends" tried to hit me up for a sale/membership after the service. Real classy.)

She failed to mention the other part of her "treatment," which was belittling and scolding Mom for forgetting things, falling asleep at the dinner table, pooping in her diapers ... things that Mom had no control over. Raising her voice at Mom was what brought me and my sister to a serious confrontation, and even then she never admitted that it was wrong. She simply accused me of interfering, of trying to intimidate her. Yeah. She was screaming at an 82-year-old woman who trembled when being yelled at, and then spun it against me when I stood up for Mom.

It was never easy caring for Mom, but it was always worthwhile to be near her, to offer her comfort and a sounding board when her mind was alert and she had things to say. She had a lot to say. Sometimes she wanted to move out of my sister's house because of all the mistreatment. In the end, though, she was content to be near her grandson and even her daughter. She forgave.

What my sister should've realized is that many of us had tough relationships with our parents, and being honest, being true, and showing that sense of remorse in spite of that friction is more real and more human than the fricking sugarcoat show with her celebrity buddy.

Other than that, I feel good about what happened tonight, and I think Mom feels good too. It was cathartic. So many people were affected by her.

I still miss her and memories of her still drift through my mind at the oddest moments. I still catch myself crying or almost crying now and then. But it's getting better. That's what family and friends can do for a heavy heart. I know Mom's at total peace now, in total joy. That's all I really could ask for.

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